The Hard Easy—Review

The Hard Easy is a direct-to-DVD movie starring David Boreanaz, which was released this week. Of course I had my copy preordered, just waiting for the long weekend so I could pop it in and watch it in a leisurely fashion. Well, as much of a leisurely fashion as I can manage, anyway.

The plot goes thusly: Down on his luck gambler Paul (Henry Thomas) needs money--a lot of it--because, well, he's down on his luck, and owes people a ton of money. Stockbroker Roger (David Boreanaz) needs money--a lot of it--because a scheme concocted by his marginally insane boss Buckaroo Banzai Ed (Peter Weller) went sideways. Both of them end up involved in a plan to rob a jewelry store of a shipment of diamonds. Unfortunately, it's the same jewelry store, and the same diamonds. Hilarity Chaos ensues.

In spite of a few rather annoying (and unsuccessful) attempts to make itself look like a Guy Ritchie movie, The Hard Easy is a fairly solid caper movie, with plenty of plot twists, most of which actually even make sense--always a plus. The last act is almost absurdly violent, although that's pretty common for this type of movie, but it never quite veers dark enough to jar the slightly smirky tone established from the beginning. Overall, not a bad movie, and well worth a watch.

For Boreanaz fans, there's a long expository scene between Boreanaz and Peter Weller which is conducted with Boreanaz shirtless throughout for no really good reason. Kudos to the screenwriters for gratuitous Boreanaz shirtlessness. It makes any movie better.

Rated R for pervasive naughty words and lots of people getting shot.

Also starring Vera Farmiga, Bruce Dern, Nick Lachey and Gary Busey.

The Hard Easy Available for Pre-Order

The Hard Easy, a direct-to-DVD movie starring David Boreanaz, Nick Lachey, Peter Weller and Henry Thomas, is available for pre-order at amazon.com.

From imdb:
Two separate teams of jewel thieves, one low-rent and one upscale, both desperate, converge on the same score at the exact same time, and a simple job turns out very complicated and very bloody.

Devour

A 2005 direct-to-DVD movie starring Jensen Ackles, Devour (or, as it says at amazon, DeVour) is...well, let's just say if you're not a die-hard Jensen Ackles fan, you might want to skip this one.

If you are a die-hard Jensen Ackles fan, Devour delivers on the Looking at Jensen Being Pretty front. However, on the Having a Good Plot front, it's not so satisfying. Ackles plays Jake Gray, a normal sort of college student who works repairing computers. For his birthday, he's gifted with membership to an online game called the Pathway. Havoc ensues as the Pathway proves to be not just a game, but more of a, um...cultish kind of Satanic um... something or other. (Yes, I watched the movie. No, it's not clear at all.) His friends meet horrible fates, per the expectations of the horror genre. Not that their fates really make a great deal of sense within the context of the movie, but they're certainly horrible. Anyway, it appears the Pathway is ultimately geared toward guiding Jake to his final destiny and the truth about his past, none of which is well set up or foreshadowed in any way. The final reveal of what this destiny is provides a far from satisfying conclusion.

In short, I can't recommend this movie to anyone who isn't there just for Ackles, because if you're not appreciating the pretty, there's not much left to appreciate in this muddled storyline.

A bit of trivia--Jensen's father Alan Ackles appears in this movie as Paul Kilton.

Rated R for violence, language, random office chair sex, much smoking of pot, and confusing the viewing audience.

Mr. Fix It

This isn't technically TV, but it's a direct-to-DVD movie starring David Boreanaz, so I think I'll talk about it, anyway.

Between the cancellation of Angel and the pick-up of Bones, David Boreanaz was a busy man. During that time period, he worked on These Girls, The Hard Easy, and Mr. Fix It. These Girls saw theatrical release in Canada and a DVD release in the US, The Hard Easy, with Nick Lachey, has yet to surface, and Mr. Fix It came out just after Christmas as a direct-to-DVD release.

I truthfully wasn't expecting a great deal from this movie, and as a result I was pleasantly surprised. Boreanaz plays Lance Valenteen, aka Mr. Fix It. Convinced he's incapable of true love himself, Valenteen helps mend broken relationships by dating women who've dumped pining men and behaving so obnoxiously that the women rush back to their exes, realizing they weren't so bad after all (the opening sequence, showcasing several of Valenteen's targets, is quite amusing). But after the manner of the romantic comedy, Valenteen finally faces a case he can't bring himself to close because, contrary to all his expectations, he's fallen for the woman in question.

Boreanaz puts in a decent, if sometimes over the top, performance here, very different from what we're used to seeing in his TV roles. The story itself is fun, if predictable, and moves along at a good pace. Some of the jokes are a bit strained, and the ending is a bit pat, but no more so than in many other recent romantic comedies I've seen. And the sub-plot with Valenteen's retiree friends is charming. Overall, I found Mr. Fix It to be an enjoyable romp.

One thing I don't understand is the R rating. While several of the jokes are off color, there's almost no bad language in this movie, and the single sex scene features no nudity at all, more's the pity. (Boreanaz should have a clause in every contract requiring gratuitous nudity. Just sayin'.) It almost seems to me that the MPAA rates direct-to-DVD movies more strictly than theatrical releases.

Some personal favorite moments:
The promotional cartoons of Valenteen, pointy hair and all, are hysterical. The blue shirt he wears in the live-action portions of the promotional video is the opposite of hysterical, in that it made me nearly slide off my chaise lounge in amazement at Boreanaz's gigantic shoulders.

The dance scene, in which Sophia (Alana De La Garza) divests Valenteen of his shirt. Yes, I am shallow. Did you want to make something of it?

Rated R for horny dog action, fully clothed sex, and some crude jokes.